Thank you, it means a lot! I actually felt really sad writing it
Suddenly, on the fourth day, Doctor Sparks was coming up smiling to them and nurses were bustling around Louise’s tank.
“She’s fine.”
“What?” asked Declan, hardly daring to believe it.
“Louise is going to be absolutely fine. We’ll keep her here for a few more days, just to make sure that the infection is not going to set back in, but she should be fine.”
Declan let out a laugh of joy and the doctor continued,
“And there don’t seem to me to be any signs of mental or physical effect. We’re going to look for it, obviously, whenever she comes in for a routine checkup, but I think we can say that she has had a full recovery.”
Bridget could not believe it and still felt numb. She felt that she couldn’t believe it until she had Louise back and Declan voiced it by asking,
“So when can we -?” but he was cut off by a nurse coming up to them smiling with Louise in her arms and giving her to Bridget.
“She’s all yours,” the nurse told them gently and then left them alone.
Bridget stared down at her and finally one small tear fell onto Louise’s face, but she brushed it away and felt some kind of indescribable joy flow through. She could not speak, could not thank the doctors and nurses who had managed to save their little girl’s life, but Declan did enough of it for both of them, thanking them over and over and shaking their hands and even hugging them. Bridget was only able to look up and give them a smile, but it seemed to say everything and Doctor Sparks smiled back at her and nodded.
“Don’t thank me. We were just doing our job.”
“You saved her,” said Declan, over and over. “You saved her.”
Bridget just gently held her and reading her mind the doctor added,
“You can feed her again Bridget. There’s no danger anymore.”
Bridget felt a tear come down her cheek again but she still couldn’t speak. He didn’t mind though and seemed to understand, and smiled as Declan thanked him again and then told them that they would move them and Louise into a room for the next few days.
“I’d let her go home now but it’s just to be absolutely sure,” he told them. “But I do promise that she is well and truly out of danger.”
Bridget carried Louise out of the ward, feeling a shudder, and praying silently that never, ever again in her life would she have to go in there again. Doctor Sparks showed them a room which had a single bed and a cot for Louise, and there was a buzzer they could use if they thought there was any danger. The he left them alone with their daughter.
“I can’t believe it!” exclaimed Declan, happy tears falling down his cheeks. “Louise is going to be fine! Didge, can you believe it? Didge?”
“No, I can’t,” she said quietly and Declan felt worried and sat next to her.
“Are you okay?”
“Just emotional,” she said quickly, and she managed a smile. He smiled in relief and Bridget handed him Louise.
“Hello, angel,” he whispered to her, giving her a kiss. Louise wriggled slightly. “I missed you so much.”
As Bridget watched them she wondered what was wrong with her. She had just endured the worst three days of her life, numbly preparing herself for the unthinkable, and now that she had heard the very opposite, why wasn’t she crying with happiness like Declan? It had to be the hospital, she thought firmly. She would feel okay after they had gone.
“I’m going to ring everyone,” announced Declan. “And we are going to have a party when we get home! Oh – someone wants her mummy!” as Louise started to whimper.
“Come here,” said Bridget gently, taking her daughter as Declan took his phone out and slipped away to make the calls, and began feeding her. Bridget finally felt some of the numbness begin to fade as she held Louise, and cried a little, but could not fully relax. As she finished feeding and winded her Declan came in, and she pushed it away and smiled.
“Everyone’s on their way,” he told her, slipping the phone back into his pocket and sitting by her.
“You should go home tonight,” said Bridget, looking at him. He looked uncertain.
“Indy must have missed you so much,” she added.
“I know,” he said quickly, “but I’ve missed Louise too. It feels like I’m never going to stop missing holding her.”
“Okay,” said Bridget gently, and they just say together, watching their daughter until there was a knock on the door and Rebecca came in with India, who raced up to her parents and hugged her father tightly around the waist (Louise was in Bridget’s arms).
“She’s going to be okay?” asked Rebecca uncertainly and when her son nodded she gasped happily and started to cry.
“They’re just keeping her in a few more days to be sure,” he told them and Rebecca nodded, tears glistening on her cheeks.
"I told you it would be fine," she managed to say to Declan and he laughed and nodded and they hugged tightly.
“Mummy, Daddy, can you come home?” asked India suddenly.
“Sweetheart, we have to stay with Louise,” said Bridget gently. “I’m sorry.”
“Oh,” said India miserably and after quickly glancing at his wife and youngest daughter Declan said,
“But I can come home Indy.”
Her face lit up.
“Really?”
“Your mum and sister are okay for the night.”
India hugged him tightly and Bridget gave him a kiss. She allowed Rebecca to hold Louise and as she looked lost in her granddaughter Bridget hugged India too.
“Mummy, I missed you,” she whispered.
“I missed you more than anything,” said Bridget, kissing her unruly curls, and longed to go home as well, with Louise. She had not realised how much she had missed India until that moment, her beautiful eldest child.
“Mummy, I’m sorry,” whispered India.
“Sorry for what?”
“Sorry for Louise getting sick.”
Before Bridget could question this Rebecca suddenly announced,
“I think this calls for pizza!” and India was pulling away and shrieking happily, and after kisses all round and even India cuddling her sister, they were waving goodbye.
“Are you sure you want to go home?” asked Bridget, as Declan held Louise.
“No,” he said happily, “but you were right. Indy needs both of us and as we can’t give her that for now one of us should be home and it should be me. Louise needs you more.”
Bridget didn’t know what to say so she just smiled.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” asked Declan anxiously but she insisted,
“Yes. It’s just been hard.”
“It’s been that,” he agreed, and went and sat back down with her. Louise began to whimper again and Bridget gratefully took and fed her, never wanting that taken from her again.
But over the next few days Bridget would not leave Louise and would not go home, even if Declan was there.
“She’s going to be okay,” he told her, but Bridget couldn’t let go, couldn’t relax.
“I know,” she said, looking at Louise. “It’s just until we get home – then I’ll be okay.”
Declan frowned, looking uncertain, but the worry slid from his mind as the next day the doctors were signing release forms and they were finally, for real, taking Louise home. They gave the nursing team and the doctors a bouquet of flowers and as Bridget handed it to Peggy she shyly began,
“I’m sorry –“ but Peggy cut her off.
“Don’t be. It’s totally understandable, Bridget.”
Bridget looked down and then said,
“Thank you,” and Peggy smiled at her and then they were leaving, at long, long last, and laughing as Declan waved Louise’s arm.
“Don’t come back soon!” they called and Bridget and Declan laughed and they finally returned home. Rebecca had a meal ready for them and they all ate together, India seeming quiet also, but Bridget guessed that that was down to the emotion of the past few days. She clung to her parents and would not stop looking at her sister, but not in the angry sort of manner she had done before. Bridget could not stop watching Louise either. She thought that once they had got away from the hospital she would feel better, feel the intense happiness and even tears which Bridget would have welcomed, but they still didn’t come, and instead it felt as though they had just been replaced with a fear. Bridget couldn’t relax back into life and in the party they had on Tuesday night she held Louise almost all of the time, only letting go of her when others asked to hold her. It wasn’t a real party, only her family and friends round for a few drinks, but Bridget felt even drained, despite being happy to see everyone and although she smiled for everyone, and laughed, Bridget still felt on edge. India was quiet too, not in the rude way she had been before, but not her normal talkative self and Bridget knew she should probably talk to her too. It was unlike Indy to have nothing to say but just as she followed India to the kitchen to have a chat with her the doorbell rang and India ran to get it. It was Joanna, Josie and Clara, and they laughed as Indy hugged them all around the waist in turn and led them inside.
“Does she like her teddy?” Josie asked.
“She loves it,” assured Bridget but Clara looked unconvinced.
“Josie, she’s three weeks old! She doesn’t know what a teddy bear is!”
“Clara!” exclaimed Bridget, seeing Josie’s hurt expression. “Don’t be mean. She does love it, I can tell.”
Bridget had laid their teddy into Louise’s basket the night before and Louise had her hand round it in the morning.
“Okay,” said Clara, but Bridget could tell she didn’t believe her. “Sorry...”
“Go and get some drinks,” ordered Joanna and they went to find some lemonade, with India showing them the way.
“India!” called Bridget, the thought suddenly occurring to her, “let Josie or Clara pour it!”
Joanna and Bridget smiled nervously at each other.
“Thanks for being there,” said Bridget shyly, playing with her sleeve. “At the hospital.”
“Of course I came,” said Joanna quietly. “She’s my...well. You know what I mean.”
“She’s your granddaughter too,” said Bridget quietly and Joanna looked touched. She opened her mouth and then shut it and then she and Bridget hugged and the girls came back. Bridget looked up and saw Miranda looking, and then giving Bridget a small smile and Bridget felt a little sad. She knew Miranda would never feel completely comfortable around them. Bridget carried Louise to the sofa when she went to properly talk to Joanna, Josie and Clara, feeling nervous when she let them hold her and when Louise was down for the night she stared at her daughter for a long time. Miranda came and saw her and put her arm round her.
“She’s beautiful, isn’t she?”
Bridget nodded silently, still staring at her.
“Riley wanted to come,” her mother continued. “But he couldn’t get the time off work.”
“Louise is okay,” said Bridget quietly. “It’s okay.”
“It’s still a shame.”
Bridget shrugged but nodded.
“How are you doing?” Miranda asked in a worried voice. “You’ve been very quiet.”
Bridget was silent for a moment and then said,
“It’s been hard, Mum.”
“I know,” said Miranda, squeezing her shoulders. Bridget felt like a little girl again. She thought for a moment about telling her mother that she couldn’t cry but then suddenly felt that she couldn't.
“Do you want to me get rid of everyone?” Miranda asked softly. “Just say the word and you can have some peace. Everyone will understand.”
Bridget half-wanted to say yes, but it felt rude and, in a way, she felt safer with everyone there so she shook her head and looked up at her mother.
“No, it’s okay Mum. I don’t mind them being here and it will probably only be for another hour or so anyway.”
“You’re sure?” asked Miranda, taking her shoulders and stepping back, treating Bridget like she was ten again. She knew her daughter.
“Yes,” sighed Bridget, but she managed to smile. “Really, Mum, it’s okay. Let’s go and get a drink.”
So Miranda put an arm round her and they went back to the party.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” asked Declan the next morning, as they woke up, and Bridget looked up at him from the pillow.
“Of course I am.”
He hesitated.
“You still seem upset. You seemed upset at the party.”
“It’s been an awful week,” said Bridget defensively, sitting up.
“I know,” conceded Declan but he looked hard at Bridget.
“Are you sure you don’t want to me get another day off work? I can call in, they’ll understand...”
“Declan, no,” exclaimed Bridget. “You can’t miss more work – you’ve missed a whole week already.”
“Yeah, for the most important reason ever. They’re not going to fire me if I tell them that you and Louise need another day.”
“But we’re fine,” protested Bridget. “We’re honestly fine, I swear. Please go.”
He didn’t look certain.
“I’ll call you if I’m upset,” said Bridget finally. “I promise. I swear.”
“Okay,” gave in Declan, giving her a kiss. “If you absolutely promise me. Now, how’s my little girl today?” and he got up and went towards Louise’s basket.
“Hungry,” sighed Bridget, as she started crying, but she smiled as he handed Louise to her. “But I don’t mind.”
Declan smiled at his wife and daughter and then got dressed, wolfing down his breakfast as he had not realised he was running late, and giving his wife and daughters a quick kiss on the top of their heads.
“See you guys later!” he called, forgetting India’s rule, but to Bridget’s surprise she didn’t get cross.
“I thought you’d get angry!” said Bridget.
“I miss Daddy,” said India sadly. “I liked him being home.”
“Me too. You’re not cross that he didn’t call us girls?”
India shrugged and took her bowl to the sink and Bridget sighed. She wanted a proper talk with her daughter but then Louise started crying. Bridget calmed her, feeling anxious, but any trace of illness seemed gone. Louise cried for an hour, however and then Bridget remembered that Emily was going swimming with India shortly and she was sure India was looking forward to it. She and India could talk later, she supposed, and she followed India into her bedroom, carrying Louise, to help her daughter get ready. They had not had a real talk since...Bridget couldn't think. Her mind had been swum with Louise being ill and the past two days had been filled with family visits and ensuring that Louise was really okay. Bridget made a mental note to have a real talk with India later that day.
“Have you got everything?” Bridget asked, going through her swimming bag and India nodded. Bridget put down the bag.
“Do you still want to go?” she asked gently, in the same way Miranda had talked to her last night. “If you don’t want to go Emily’s mummy won’t be cross.”
“I still want to go,” said India and Bridget nodded, and then noticed something.
“Where’s that loose tooth gone?”
“It fell out,” mumbled India.
“When?” exclaimed Bridget.
“When I went to Emily’s house and you and Daddy got mad at me. It fell out at the playground when Marcus called me a bogan.”
“What?” exclaimed Bridget. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You were mad,” said India simply. “I tried to. Louise was crying.”
Bridget felt terrible.
“Tell me all about it,” she said but then the doorbell rang. It was Emily’s mother.
“Tell me later,” she said, kissing the top of India’s head and going with her to get her shoes on. “And you’re sure you want to go?”
“Yes,” said India firmly and so Bridget opened the door to Emily and her mother, allowing them to coo over Louise.
“Oh, what a terrible thing to happen,” said Emily’s mother. “It must have been so awful...”
Bridget let her talk for a while but finally, after Emily pulled at her wrist, she remembered the time.
“I’ll drop India back at three,” she promised and then she and the girls went, India turning and waving goodbye. Bridget waved at them and went to sit down on the sofa with Louise, sighing. She had only sat for a moment, however, when the doorbell rang again. Irritably she got up and threw the door open, expecting it to be India forgetting something or a salesman but it wasn’t.
There at the door stood Rachel.