Post by sophie on Jul 9, 2010 20:22:31 GMT
Thanks!
On Thursday morning Bridget sat in work, urging herself to concentrate. She felt tired from getting up early and Declan had exclaimed at her, saying to give herself a break. But she didn’t need to slow it down, she had argued back – hadn’t she slept in on both Saturday and Sunday?
“But you’ve got up early every day this week,” he had said.
“And it’s a good thing,” she had said firmly. “That means I’m studying more and will have a better chance of getting into uni some time.”
“Stubborn old Didge!” he had sighed at her.
“I probably won’t have a chance at all when the baby comes,” she had said, which had shut him up. “Don’t you want me to keep up?”
He’d put his hands up and gone to get dressed and Bridget had studied a little longer, before waking her daughter and had felt accomplished, but now she felt tired and rubbed her eyes a little and the baby kicked. Maybe maternity leave would be more relaxing. She hadn’t slept well anyway; the visit had turned over and over in her mind the night before. She’d thought about what Joanna had said about her father – her first father – being good at flipping pancakes, and then it was all she could think about, and she had said hesitantly,
“Dec?” into the dark and he had sleepily replied,
“Yeah?”
“It was my dad who taught me to flip pancakes. Steve, I mean, not Joanna’s boyfriend. I really couldn’t do it before. He had to show me. He did, didn’t he?”
“Of course he did,” Declan had said comfortingly, and had leant over and kissed her, but Bridget had still not been able to sleep and had suddenly wanted her dad, and then she had finally fallen asleep dreaming about when she was a child and Steve teaching her to flip pancakes.
“You’re ace at that Didge,” her father had said in the dream. “Who showed you?”
“You,” she had said in confusion. “You showed me.”
She had woken up saying it, still feeling sad, and had got up if only not to dream it again. The price was feeling tired all through study and work, but now her shift ended and Bridget made her slow way down to town, and smiled when Donna came into sight. Donna would take her mind off things.
“You get bigger every day!” was her greeting.
“Well, it’s not long until I’ll be eight months pregnant.”
“It looks like there’s a beach ball stuck under there.”
“Thanks!” said Bridget with a laugh. “I know what you mean, though. I swear I wasn’t this big with India.”
“How’s my goddaughter?” asked Donna as they went into the cafe.
“Her normal self, pretty much. We went baby shopping on Saturday and she acted up a bit because she was bored, but she said sorry for it later.”
“Baby shopping!” squealed Donna. “Aw, that’s so cute. I want to go baby shopping. Can we go baby shopping?”
“No, Donna!”
“But doesn’t it make you feel excited?” asked Donna after they had chosen their drinks. “I get broody whenever I see baby stuff.”
“I guess a bit,” said Bridget with a shy grin. “I sort of insisted on getting this gorgeous little dress. Well, I was going to leave it but Declan went and bought it anyway.”
“That’s sweet of him.”
“I know. Especially if it’s not a girl in the end.”
“What’s the dress like? You should put the kid in it even if it’s not a girl.”
“It has rabbits on it,” laughed Bridget. “And imagine that! Someone looks at the baby in the dress and says, What’s her name? Imagine their reaction when they hear it’s actually a boy!”
“It’s a baby. People used to put boys in baby dresses.”
“Yeah, they used to. Ages ago.”
“At least it wouldn’t be a waste of money that way.”
“If this one’s a boy and you have a daughter someday you’re welcome to it.”
“Really?” exclaimed Donna and she gave Bridget a hug. “Thanks Didge! Though what if it is a boy and you have another baby and it’s a girl?”
“Another baby?!” exclaimed Bridget and she gave Donna a small push. “No way! I’m never, ever going through this again! Two are enough!”
“I think one would be enough for me!”
“You’d be a great mum. I can imagine all your kids causing mischief.”
Donna giggled and wrinkled her nose a little.
“Well, I don’t know if I even want children. How was your weekend, anyway?”
“Joanna and the girls came round to our place.”
“Any fireworks?” Donna took a sip of her drink.
“No,” said Bridget. “It was great. Dec was great, he really was. It wasn’t even that awkward – apart from between Joanna and Clara.”
“How come?”
“Clara’s in preteen hell. She had some sort of row with her boyfriend and is taking it out on her mum, it seems. She was just being snotty.”
“I guess she’ll grow out of it. We all went through it.”
“I can’t ever imagine you being snotty, Donna!” said Bridget and she laughed.
“I guess I wasn’t that bad – I don’t know. I mostly remember making up designs and trying to make a dress out of leaves.”
“That’s so you!” said Bridget and she burst into laughter. “That’s totally Donna Freedman! I wish I could have seen your dress.”
“It didn’t look like much. What about you, anyway? What were you like at twelve?”
“Just moody,” shrugged Bridget. “Not too different other than that. I still loved animals and footy. I didn’t get on with the girls at school that well and I hung out with all the guys. Well – I say I didn’t get on with them. I didn’t know them. They used to talk about boyfriends and makeup and shopping and I wasn’t interested at all. Mum always went on about how it wasn’t healthy for me to not have any female friends, and it drove me mad. She kept on about how I needed a girl friend at the age I was and that I should stop wearing pants and shorts and start wearing dresses and skirts as I was getting older and I used to tell her to leave me alone. And then we’d have a row.”
“I guess you both came out of it okay. My mum was hardly around.”
“I suppose she was only trying to look out for me,” said Bridget, looking down. “It drove me crazy, but she thought she was doing what was best for me, I suppose. And she said I was being ungrateful, but she always made me feel like I wasn’t good enough. Of course she didn’t, but it felt that way then.”
Bridget was thoughtful and they were quiet for a moment.
“Anyway,” she said, trying to make the conversation cheerful again, “you sounded fun back then.”
“Do you think we would have been friends?”
“I hope so. I know so. Yeah, you would definitely have been a girl I would have been friends with. You wouldn’t have tried to girl me up for one thing.”
“I might have done,” said Donna with a gleam in her eye. “Remember that makeover I did on you after the slave auction?”
Bridget groaned and went red.
“Yes. Very well.”
“You looked hot after!”
“I guess,” said Bridget, who always felt embarrassed when she was described that way. “Thanks for rescuing me anyway. From Declan and Josh who were being total jerks.”
“It’s okay,” said Donna, but she looked a little sad, and Bridget wondered why for a moment and then could have kicked herself. Why had she mentioned Josh?
“Donna, I’m a total idiot. Why do we always end up talking about boys anyway?”
“It’s fine,” brushed off Donna. “Because they make good topics of conversation. Most of the time, anyway.”
“Well, we don’t have to talk about them now anyway. Clara said something funny to me when she was leaving.”
“What?”
“She said she wished she was me. Why would she say that?”
“’Cause you’re cool.”
“Thanks Donna! Not as cool as you. But do I really seem that cool to her? I’m her surprise half-sister who’s married with a kid and has another on the way. It’s not that glamorous.”
“She sounds sick of being twelve. Maybe she wants to be grown up.”
“Maybe.” Bridget bit her lip. “I am a bit worried about her. Well, I’ll see how she is when I next go over.”
They finished their drinks and left the cafe.
“I still miss Rach,” said Donna sadly as she and Bridget made their way down the high street.
“Me too,” said Bridget, and she linked her arm through Donna’s.
“She’s gone back and forth about a million times,” said Donna glumly. “I wish she’d just move back.”
“Me too,” said Bridget again, and felt sad. “I guess she’s got two homes. It must suck having them so far apart.”
“That’s a bit of an understatement! It always feels weird without her – Didge, you know I love you, but it always feels weird when it’s us two and not us three.”
“I know what you mean.”
“I’d feel the same if you weren’t here,” said Donna quickly. “It’s just that you two were the first real friends I made when I came here. It feels wrong with Rach gone.”
“I miss her too,” said Bridget. “We’ll have to save up for a surprise trip to England. I don’t know how many years it’d take – a lot - but we’d do it.”
Donna laughed.
“Definitely.”
“You could try your leaf dress, take two, the English tree edition,” teased Bridget when they suddenly stopped and stared. Josh was coming towards them.
“Hi,” he said a little sheepishly.
“Hello,” said Bridget coldly.
“Hey Donna,” said Josh, in a pleading sort of way, but she only turned to Bridget and said,
“I left my jacket behind,” and went back to the cafe.
“I screwed up,” he said apologetically before Bridget could open her mouth.
“You’re damn right you did!” she said angrily. “I got Donna to go out with you again and what did you do? Messed her around again. You like doing that, don’t you?”
“Didge!”
“No, you messed us both around,” she said angrily. “Remember the first time round? You happily went out with her and let her think it was going somewhere and it was only to wind up me and Declan. You didn’t need to use her like that. It was cruel.”
“I didn’t think at the time. I didn’t think it was serious to her –“
“You had better not be implying something!” exclaimed Bridget furiously. “Because I swear to God –“
“I’m not!” he yelped. “I didn’t mean it like that! I was dumb back then. I know I was.”
“And you were a tool the other night!”
“I didn’t mean to be. I didn’t think.”
“Well, maybe you should have. If you’re so hung up on your old girlfriend, wait. Don’t mess my friends around.”
“I thought I could move on,” he said sadly. “It wasn’t what I meant to do. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologise to me, apologise to Donna,” she said angrily and then as if on cue Donna appeared.
“Oh,” she said irritably. “You’re still here.”
“I’m sorry Donna. I really am.”
“Sure,” she said crossly. “Maybe just drink lemonade next time, huh?”
“I’m really sorry.”
“Whatever, I'e got stuff to do. We're busy. Come on, Didge.”
“I’ll never do it to you again.”
“Again?” she exclaimed and whirled round. “You won’t have another chance. I’m sorry things didn’t work out between you and your girlfriend but you can’t just try me out to see if you’ve moved on or not.”
“I never meant you were!”
“Look,” said Donna. “You’re not over her. I hope you work things out or move on. But just – just don’t take me out and make me hear all about it. I’m worth more.”
She hurried ahead and Didge, not really sure why, stood back for a moment. He looked as though he had been punched.
“I didn’t mean to act like I did,” he said sadly.
“Donna’s hurt,” said Bridget. “And she’s taken it personally but she has a point. You’re not over her.”
“I loved her very much. I still love her. We had this dumb row – but we’d had a few dumb rows, and we’d both had awful days and then she just said that that was it, that we needed a break. And we haven’t spoken to each other since.”
“At all?”
“I wanted to. I picked up the phone and nearly went over there once. But I chickened out and now it feels too late.”
“Maybe it’s not.” Bridget looked over to her friend. “I’m going anyway. You were really dumb Josh, but I hope you work it out, even if you don’t make up.”
“Do you think Donna will forgive me?”
“I don’t know,” she said shortly. “Bye. Take care.”
“I’m sorry,” she said when she had caught Donna up. “I’m sorry I dumped Josh on you twice. I’m really sorry.”
“It’s not your fault.”
“You didn’t seem so angry before,” said Bridget tentatively.
“I wasn’t,” she said, and shook her head. “No, that’s a lie, I was. But I was trying to see it his way so I’d feel less hurt. It didn’t work that well, did it?”
Bridget put a comforting arm around her friend and kissed her on the cheek.
“Forget him. He isn’t worth it. Let’s go shopping.”
Donna stopped and stared at her.
“Is the apocalypse here?”
“I was just being nice –“
“It must be. The world is ending! Bridget Parker NEVER suggests shopping!”
“Well, if you don’t want to –“
“No, I do!” cried Donna, sounding like a child. “Please, Didge? Please with a cherry on top?”
“Okay,” laughed Bridget and they went to a shop and the afternoon melted away.
On Thursday morning Bridget sat in work, urging herself to concentrate. She felt tired from getting up early and Declan had exclaimed at her, saying to give herself a break. But she didn’t need to slow it down, she had argued back – hadn’t she slept in on both Saturday and Sunday?
“But you’ve got up early every day this week,” he had said.
“And it’s a good thing,” she had said firmly. “That means I’m studying more and will have a better chance of getting into uni some time.”
“Stubborn old Didge!” he had sighed at her.
“I probably won’t have a chance at all when the baby comes,” she had said, which had shut him up. “Don’t you want me to keep up?”
He’d put his hands up and gone to get dressed and Bridget had studied a little longer, before waking her daughter and had felt accomplished, but now she felt tired and rubbed her eyes a little and the baby kicked. Maybe maternity leave would be more relaxing. She hadn’t slept well anyway; the visit had turned over and over in her mind the night before. She’d thought about what Joanna had said about her father – her first father – being good at flipping pancakes, and then it was all she could think about, and she had said hesitantly,
“Dec?” into the dark and he had sleepily replied,
“Yeah?”
“It was my dad who taught me to flip pancakes. Steve, I mean, not Joanna’s boyfriend. I really couldn’t do it before. He had to show me. He did, didn’t he?”
“Of course he did,” Declan had said comfortingly, and had leant over and kissed her, but Bridget had still not been able to sleep and had suddenly wanted her dad, and then she had finally fallen asleep dreaming about when she was a child and Steve teaching her to flip pancakes.
“You’re ace at that Didge,” her father had said in the dream. “Who showed you?”
“You,” she had said in confusion. “You showed me.”
She had woken up saying it, still feeling sad, and had got up if only not to dream it again. The price was feeling tired all through study and work, but now her shift ended and Bridget made her slow way down to town, and smiled when Donna came into sight. Donna would take her mind off things.
“You get bigger every day!” was her greeting.
“Well, it’s not long until I’ll be eight months pregnant.”
“It looks like there’s a beach ball stuck under there.”
“Thanks!” said Bridget with a laugh. “I know what you mean, though. I swear I wasn’t this big with India.”
“How’s my goddaughter?” asked Donna as they went into the cafe.
“Her normal self, pretty much. We went baby shopping on Saturday and she acted up a bit because she was bored, but she said sorry for it later.”
“Baby shopping!” squealed Donna. “Aw, that’s so cute. I want to go baby shopping. Can we go baby shopping?”
“No, Donna!”
“But doesn’t it make you feel excited?” asked Donna after they had chosen their drinks. “I get broody whenever I see baby stuff.”
“I guess a bit,” said Bridget with a shy grin. “I sort of insisted on getting this gorgeous little dress. Well, I was going to leave it but Declan went and bought it anyway.”
“That’s sweet of him.”
“I know. Especially if it’s not a girl in the end.”
“What’s the dress like? You should put the kid in it even if it’s not a girl.”
“It has rabbits on it,” laughed Bridget. “And imagine that! Someone looks at the baby in the dress and says, What’s her name? Imagine their reaction when they hear it’s actually a boy!”
“It’s a baby. People used to put boys in baby dresses.”
“Yeah, they used to. Ages ago.”
“At least it wouldn’t be a waste of money that way.”
“If this one’s a boy and you have a daughter someday you’re welcome to it.”
“Really?” exclaimed Donna and she gave Bridget a hug. “Thanks Didge! Though what if it is a boy and you have another baby and it’s a girl?”
“Another baby?!” exclaimed Bridget and she gave Donna a small push. “No way! I’m never, ever going through this again! Two are enough!”
“I think one would be enough for me!”
“You’d be a great mum. I can imagine all your kids causing mischief.”
Donna giggled and wrinkled her nose a little.
“Well, I don’t know if I even want children. How was your weekend, anyway?”
“Joanna and the girls came round to our place.”
“Any fireworks?” Donna took a sip of her drink.
“No,” said Bridget. “It was great. Dec was great, he really was. It wasn’t even that awkward – apart from between Joanna and Clara.”
“How come?”
“Clara’s in preteen hell. She had some sort of row with her boyfriend and is taking it out on her mum, it seems. She was just being snotty.”
“I guess she’ll grow out of it. We all went through it.”
“I can’t ever imagine you being snotty, Donna!” said Bridget and she laughed.
“I guess I wasn’t that bad – I don’t know. I mostly remember making up designs and trying to make a dress out of leaves.”
“That’s so you!” said Bridget and she burst into laughter. “That’s totally Donna Freedman! I wish I could have seen your dress.”
“It didn’t look like much. What about you, anyway? What were you like at twelve?”
“Just moody,” shrugged Bridget. “Not too different other than that. I still loved animals and footy. I didn’t get on with the girls at school that well and I hung out with all the guys. Well – I say I didn’t get on with them. I didn’t know them. They used to talk about boyfriends and makeup and shopping and I wasn’t interested at all. Mum always went on about how it wasn’t healthy for me to not have any female friends, and it drove me mad. She kept on about how I needed a girl friend at the age I was and that I should stop wearing pants and shorts and start wearing dresses and skirts as I was getting older and I used to tell her to leave me alone. And then we’d have a row.”
“I guess you both came out of it okay. My mum was hardly around.”
“I suppose she was only trying to look out for me,” said Bridget, looking down. “It drove me crazy, but she thought she was doing what was best for me, I suppose. And she said I was being ungrateful, but she always made me feel like I wasn’t good enough. Of course she didn’t, but it felt that way then.”
Bridget was thoughtful and they were quiet for a moment.
“Anyway,” she said, trying to make the conversation cheerful again, “you sounded fun back then.”
“Do you think we would have been friends?”
“I hope so. I know so. Yeah, you would definitely have been a girl I would have been friends with. You wouldn’t have tried to girl me up for one thing.”
“I might have done,” said Donna with a gleam in her eye. “Remember that makeover I did on you after the slave auction?”
Bridget groaned and went red.
“Yes. Very well.”
“You looked hot after!”
“I guess,” said Bridget, who always felt embarrassed when she was described that way. “Thanks for rescuing me anyway. From Declan and Josh who were being total jerks.”
“It’s okay,” said Donna, but she looked a little sad, and Bridget wondered why for a moment and then could have kicked herself. Why had she mentioned Josh?
“Donna, I’m a total idiot. Why do we always end up talking about boys anyway?”
“It’s fine,” brushed off Donna. “Because they make good topics of conversation. Most of the time, anyway.”
“Well, we don’t have to talk about them now anyway. Clara said something funny to me when she was leaving.”
“What?”
“She said she wished she was me. Why would she say that?”
“’Cause you’re cool.”
“Thanks Donna! Not as cool as you. But do I really seem that cool to her? I’m her surprise half-sister who’s married with a kid and has another on the way. It’s not that glamorous.”
“She sounds sick of being twelve. Maybe she wants to be grown up.”
“Maybe.” Bridget bit her lip. “I am a bit worried about her. Well, I’ll see how she is when I next go over.”
They finished their drinks and left the cafe.
“I still miss Rach,” said Donna sadly as she and Bridget made their way down the high street.
“Me too,” said Bridget, and she linked her arm through Donna’s.
“She’s gone back and forth about a million times,” said Donna glumly. “I wish she’d just move back.”
“Me too,” said Bridget again, and felt sad. “I guess she’s got two homes. It must suck having them so far apart.”
“That’s a bit of an understatement! It always feels weird without her – Didge, you know I love you, but it always feels weird when it’s us two and not us three.”
“I know what you mean.”
“I’d feel the same if you weren’t here,” said Donna quickly. “It’s just that you two were the first real friends I made when I came here. It feels wrong with Rach gone.”
“I miss her too,” said Bridget. “We’ll have to save up for a surprise trip to England. I don’t know how many years it’d take – a lot - but we’d do it.”
Donna laughed.
“Definitely.”
“You could try your leaf dress, take two, the English tree edition,” teased Bridget when they suddenly stopped and stared. Josh was coming towards them.
“Hi,” he said a little sheepishly.
“Hello,” said Bridget coldly.
“Hey Donna,” said Josh, in a pleading sort of way, but she only turned to Bridget and said,
“I left my jacket behind,” and went back to the cafe.
“I screwed up,” he said apologetically before Bridget could open her mouth.
“You’re damn right you did!” she said angrily. “I got Donna to go out with you again and what did you do? Messed her around again. You like doing that, don’t you?”
“Didge!”
“No, you messed us both around,” she said angrily. “Remember the first time round? You happily went out with her and let her think it was going somewhere and it was only to wind up me and Declan. You didn’t need to use her like that. It was cruel.”
“I didn’t think at the time. I didn’t think it was serious to her –“
“You had better not be implying something!” exclaimed Bridget furiously. “Because I swear to God –“
“I’m not!” he yelped. “I didn’t mean it like that! I was dumb back then. I know I was.”
“And you were a tool the other night!”
“I didn’t mean to be. I didn’t think.”
“Well, maybe you should have. If you’re so hung up on your old girlfriend, wait. Don’t mess my friends around.”
“I thought I could move on,” he said sadly. “It wasn’t what I meant to do. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologise to me, apologise to Donna,” she said angrily and then as if on cue Donna appeared.
“Oh,” she said irritably. “You’re still here.”
“I’m sorry Donna. I really am.”
“Sure,” she said crossly. “Maybe just drink lemonade next time, huh?”
“I’m really sorry.”
“Whatever, I'e got stuff to do. We're busy. Come on, Didge.”
“I’ll never do it to you again.”
“Again?” she exclaimed and whirled round. “You won’t have another chance. I’m sorry things didn’t work out between you and your girlfriend but you can’t just try me out to see if you’ve moved on or not.”
“I never meant you were!”
“Look,” said Donna. “You’re not over her. I hope you work things out or move on. But just – just don’t take me out and make me hear all about it. I’m worth more.”
She hurried ahead and Didge, not really sure why, stood back for a moment. He looked as though he had been punched.
“I didn’t mean to act like I did,” he said sadly.
“Donna’s hurt,” said Bridget. “And she’s taken it personally but she has a point. You’re not over her.”
“I loved her very much. I still love her. We had this dumb row – but we’d had a few dumb rows, and we’d both had awful days and then she just said that that was it, that we needed a break. And we haven’t spoken to each other since.”
“At all?”
“I wanted to. I picked up the phone and nearly went over there once. But I chickened out and now it feels too late.”
“Maybe it’s not.” Bridget looked over to her friend. “I’m going anyway. You were really dumb Josh, but I hope you work it out, even if you don’t make up.”
“Do you think Donna will forgive me?”
“I don’t know,” she said shortly. “Bye. Take care.”
“I’m sorry,” she said when she had caught Donna up. “I’m sorry I dumped Josh on you twice. I’m really sorry.”
“It’s not your fault.”
“You didn’t seem so angry before,” said Bridget tentatively.
“I wasn’t,” she said, and shook her head. “No, that’s a lie, I was. But I was trying to see it his way so I’d feel less hurt. It didn’t work that well, did it?”
Bridget put a comforting arm around her friend and kissed her on the cheek.
“Forget him. He isn’t worth it. Let’s go shopping.”
Donna stopped and stared at her.
“Is the apocalypse here?”
“I was just being nice –“
“It must be. The world is ending! Bridget Parker NEVER suggests shopping!”
“Well, if you don’t want to –“
“No, I do!” cried Donna, sounding like a child. “Please, Didge? Please with a cherry on top?”
“Okay,” laughed Bridget and they went to a shop and the afternoon melted away.